September 7, 2009
1. Catch and release fishing. Ummm ok. I think I’ll just go out here and stick a hook in a fish just for the fun of it. But I won’t actually catch the fish for any real reason other than I want to feel like I can fish really well. I’ll let them all go after I catch them so that I can feel like I’m not a greedy bitch. It will make me feel all warm and fuzzy to know that I let a fish lunge for food and BAM, it now has what amounts to a grappling hook gouged through its facial structure. Never fear though little fishie. After I’m done yanking it out of your flesh while you gasp for air, I’ll turn you loose and you’ll be just fine. WTF?
2.Three Minute Long Chantix Commercials. Holy Mother Of God! These things last for EVER! I timed the second one I saw, mainly because after the first one came on I went to the kitchen, got a cup of java, a lil scooby snack, checked the clothes in the dryer, and came back only to find the commercial STILL PLAYING!!??!! What the hell did it cost to put those little devils on there for three solid minutes? The idea of the price for that is staggering. I hope they get their money’s worth. If irritation was money they’d be rich off of me already.
3. Social Kissing. Ew. I just don’t get it. With all the germophobia going around, why would having someone rubbing their lips all over your face be a good idea? I’d prefer someone grab my ass to having acquaintances rubbing their face around my face. Having been a bartender for eleven years, I KNOW where some of those lips have been and I’m telling you I do NOT want them anywhere near my mouth! Just, ick!
4. Michael Jackson’s Two Month Long Wait For Burial. Now, don’t get me wrong. I think that white people (yes I’m one of them) are way too quick to put their dead in the ground. Personally I would prefer to have a little bit of time to get used to the idea that I won’t ever be able to lay eyes on my loved one again. However, two months seems to be pushing it a little. Where on earth was he for all that time? Exactly where does one store the dead if you wait two months to bury them? Do you have pay rent? Are there utilities? Too many questions. And to be honest I don’t really care enough to find out the answers. Just don’t wait two months, okay?
5. Monetary Compensation For Breaking News Tips. That’s just gruesome! Stop it. It’s like getting paid to be one of those people who wave lanterns at runaway trains. It’s getting monetary gain for someone else’s misfortune. Cut it out. Your momma probably didn’t raise you like that.
6. Teenagers. Yeah, you know. Nuff said.
5 Comments | 
Crack house humor, Crazy, Daily Life, Humor, humour, life, Teenagers, Thoughts | 
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Posted by thought4food
May 31, 2008
We got back home about an hour ago from the local weekend hangout. It’s got a movie theater, skating rink, bowling alley, arcade, diner, pool room, etc. You get the idea. The Buddha has decided that since he is now a “teenager”, he should go places and do things. This is a thrill to me. When he came to live with us he would literally fall to the floor and cry if anyone spoke to him, or hide behind the furniture when people came to visit. For him to decide to deliberately go out into the world to “see and be seen” is a monumental step in a healthy direction. But to be completely honest, it’s also a big fat pain in the ass for me.
Here’s the thing: I don’t just take my kids to large unsupervised public places and drop them off. This makes me THE MOST unpopular parental figure around, but I just can’t justify doing it. Having read a newspaper, or the internet, or caught a news broadcast at least once in the last ten years, I understand that leaving your kids places where no one knows who they belong to is just asking for trouble.
However, after the past month, I have come to the realization that I am one of three parents in our town who feel this way. I have spent four Friday nights with roughly four hundred unsupervised teenagers at this place every time. They get dropped off around six or seven and get picked up around eleven or eleven thirty. And those are just the ones who actually stay there. A lot of them just wait for their parents to get out of the parking lot and then hop in another car and leave.
At least a third of these kids are under the age of sixteen. It boggles my mind. I can’t imagine a scenario whereby it would be okay with me to have my kids at a place like that for hours on end by themselves and me have no idea what was going on. They are fighting, leaving and coming back, being accosted by strangers looking for “the girl from Yahoo”, and who knows what else. What would you have to tell yourself to make leaving your children alone in that, okay?
Is it that we consider our kids a renewable resource so it’s okay if we lose a few? Are we really so tied up in our lives that we can’t spare a few hours out of a weekend to be with our kids? I know that at this age they are almost intolerable. However, I remember being that age. I still ask my mom how it was that she kept herself from turning us all upside down in a bucket of water and leaving us there until we stopped wiggling. She just laughs and says we weren’t that bad. We WERE that bad! We were worse.
Being a teenager is the most uncomfortable time in life. You are the most uncomfortable in your own skin that you will ever be. You want to be treated as grown, and treated as a child, you feel like a grownup kid, you need everything all at once. You yourself have no idea when you need what. You might need two different things at once and all you can do is hope like hell that someone who cares about you can come up with at least one of them at approximately the right time.
But if the people who are supposed to care about you aren’t even going to bother showing up, you don’t have an icecube’s chance in hell of getting what you need. and that is sad my friend.
So, the question is……Am I wrong for being there, and watching out?
Sometimes I wonder.
*My computer hookup went AWOL the other night when I was posting this and I missed the fact that only half the post went up. Sorry bout that. Bet you thought I just went off half cocked, dintcha?
2 Comments | Family, Teenagers | Tagged: hangout, unsupervised | Permalink
Posted by thought4food
January 15, 2008
My kids tell me all kinds of stuff that’s new to me. Take for instance “Emo” kids. Emo? WTF is that? Someone who is always sad is the short explanation. Hmmm. I’d probably suck at that.
It would be just my luck that I would decide that it was my desire to make my mark in life by being an Emo girl. Then the very next day I would wake up all happy and shit! DAMMIT! Then I would have to shoot my dog just to get into the right mood for the day! Crap! How much work would that be? The PETA people would be all over me in no time!
Ok, how about going Goth? I could do that, right? I’ll go buy all black clothes, and white and black make up. I’ll never have any more wrinkles because I never have to have any more facial expressions. Of course, I’d screw up on laundry day trying to get a stain out and bleach my black goth clothes into some kind of wicked tie dyed horror, which would make me laugh so hard I cried and mess up my white caked on make up and run my black eyeliner. So, no goth for me either. *sigh*
Well, there’s always the Plastics. They’re the Uber Preps. They rule the school. They’re better than everyone. Everything they have, say, wear, eat, and do is better just because they have, say, wear, eat and do it. But dear GOD that is SO much work and I am ever so lazy at heart. Besides, my “Some call it stalking……I call it Love” Tee and blue jeans are my uniform. I will jump over 20 stylish outfits for 1 comfortable one every time. So, no Plastics for me either.
I just thank all the powers that be that I don’t have to make all those decisions anymore! I did my time baby! I paid my dues to that heartless crowd! I grew UP! I graduated high school! I’m outtie!
And I’m damn glad of it too, cuz to be completely honest, those guys scare me!
2 Comments | Blog, Crack house humor, Humor, humour, Kids, School, Teenagers | Tagged: Emo, goth, high school, Kids, middle school, plastics, preps, style | Permalink
Posted by thought4food
October 4, 2007
I watched the news today and saw a story about a foster child being sent into court ordered risk of child abuse. I have first hand experience with exactly this issue. It is both astonishing and sickening how many people will blindly send a defenceless child into danger simply because the letter of the law says to do so. It sounds eerily similar to the Nazi’s claiming that they were only following orders.
In the case of the foster child, he is 2 years old and has lived with the foster parents virtually his entire life. His parents have lost all parental rights and the foster parents want to adopt him. The birth father, a convicted pedophile who is a Mexican national, stated in court that when released from prison he intends to return to Mexico to live with his mother. His birth mother never showed up for the hearing.
However, before the foster parents can adopt him the state must try to find a blood relative who is willing to take him. After a 2 year search, the mother of the pedophile finally agreeed to take the child. Yes, this is the same woman that the pedophile father will be living with when he gets out of prison. In another country. Where the United States, the birth country of this 2 year old child, will have no jurisdiction. And the state is actually defending their position of sending this AMERICAN child there and not letting him be adopted here by the only family he has ever known.
He will be taken away from the only parents he has ever known and sent to a country he has never seen to live with people he doesn’t know, who speak a language he doesn’t understand. And why are they even thinking about doing this? Because the stated goal of Social Services Departments in this country is to keep families together. NOT……I repeat NOT the welfare of children. Look it up.
If this isn’t a case of court ordered child abuse I’ll kiss your ass on the courthouse square at high noon.
Did you know that if you have a child crossing a county line for visitation and they are abused, if you do not see the abuse yourself, and there is no physical proof of abuse, you cannot report it in your county? Because YOUR county doesn’t have jurisdiction in any other county. Think about that for a second. This means that you have to literally stand outside the windows on the sidewalk peeking in and witness the abuse yourself in order to report your child being abused in another county. Scary isn’t it?
Can you imagine what it would be like for a child to be sent into another country? No offense to Mexico, I happen to love that country. The fact that it’s another country just makes it exponentially more likely that he’ll be lost.
We wonder why people are so much more violent than they were in the past. It isn’t the availability of guns. It isn’t violence in movies and on TV. (although it might have something to do with the JackAss movies and Bam, but that’s another blog) It isn’t even drugs. For the most part those things are all symptoms and tools. Until children are big enough to DO the things that catch our attention, we allow the most atrocious things to happen to them and we hide behind the letter of the law like that makes it alright.
It took My Dearest Husband and I years of anguish and pain, along with the help of an incredibly wonderful counselor who was willing to actually DO something, to finally get our daughter out of a sentence of court ordered child abuse. And now we are seeing all the unfortunate effects of the time she spent in that hell. She will never be who she could have been if there had been more people like her counselor. She will never be the happy, light hearted little munchkin she was the first time I saw her. With alot of hard work, she CAN be a fantastic, wonderful, caring, happy woman. Unfortunately, she will have to fight a fight she had no business having to fight. She should have been protected. She wasn’t. She was tossed under the wheels of the bus by the Social Services system who believes that the law is more important than the well being of children and that blood is more meaningful than love to a child.
What the hell are we thinking?
3 Comments | Abuse, America, Blog, Blogging, Blogroll, Child Abuse, Children, Court, Crazy, Daily Life, Family, Guilty, Help, Home, Kids, Law, Legal, life, Random, Reminiscences, Rights, Seeing Red, Teenagers, Thoughts, Trial, True Story, Uncategorized, Whining | Tagged: adoption, blood ties, Child Abuse, court ordered child abuse, DHS, family law, family ties, foster parent, Nazi, protecting children, social services | Permalink
Posted by thought4food
October 4, 2007
Life is perception. How we perceive an event is our reality of it. One man’s ceiling is another man’s floor. One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. What you perceive as meaningless, someone else might perceive as the most meaningful thing in their life. Pay attention to how those important to you perceive the events in your lives. It counts.
Inaction is an action all by itself. It indicates indifference on a massive scale.
Why in the hell would anyone in this country with even ONE functioning brain cell think that Hillary Clinton would make a good president? This is a woman whose self esteem is so low that she stayed with a man who cheated on her in front of the entire world on more than one occasion. This can only mean one thing: He will pay in front of the entire world, and he will pay big! So, let’s put her in the White House????? Is she planning on giving her VP a BJ on TV during a State of the Nation Address? (Do you think I used enough acronyms in that sentence?) Women who stick around after being treated that way have one thing in mind: revenge. If Bill is smart (I know, I know, but it’s only a figure of speech) he would do something searingly outrageous and destroy her chances. It might save his life. And speaking as a woman myself, I can tell you this: Hillary remembers every one of you who have screwed her over. You might not even be aware that you did. *see paragraph one* And you will not get away unscathed either. Kenneth Star, I’m especially talking to YOU! She will smile for the cameras while she is listening in her earpiece to them tell her that the “package” has been deposited. That will be you in the East River wearing a pair of cement overshoes, going to sleep with the fishes. But only after she has caused them to make you scream like a girl. Think about it guys. Women are by far more vicious than men will ever be. And we never forget a slight. We certainly never forgive one. Putting Hillary Clinton in the White House is like dressing up Brittney Spears and putting HER in the White House. Sounds good, don’t it?
I wonder if the people that Blackwater were hired to guard and protect in Iraq want them gone? I haven’t heard anyone ask them. I haven’t heard any of them say. I would love to hear the answer to those questions. I also wonder who it was that Blackwater had with them at the time of the last big incident that caused all this hooohaaa. I hate magicians because I feel like misdirection is inherently dishonest. So this last big deal over Blackwater makes me wonder who was there and why all the fingers are pointing in so many different directions, but no one is saying who was with them.
Why are children always at their most obnoxious when my head hurts?#$%^&*
What parents say and what kids hear are two completely different things. example: Me-“Hi Honey, how was your day?”
Them-“Why R U gettin all up in my KoolAid?” That wasn’t a good exchange at all was it? We had no exchange of information, no exchange of pleasantries at all. That’s because what they hear is not what we said.
Me-how was your day translation: What did you do that was wrong or that I’m going to get a call from your school about before the day is through?
No wonder the response is so vehement! I have no solution for this distortion as yet, however I am working on it and as soon as I perfect the formula, I will put it on a paid programming commercial at 4:45am and you too can have it for 6 easy payments of JUST $19.95 plus shipping and handling!
When we were kids our dad used to wake us up every morning and whip us before he went to work. He did this because he knew that before he got home that night we would have done something to deserve it. He was right. I’m thinking about reviving that old tradition. Either that, or take up drinking. I’m not really sure which way I’m going to go yet. I’m leaning towards the whipping, but I’m not sure I could stand all that whining and crying. But after the first time or two, I’d probably cowboy up and stop doing that. On the other hand, drinking would be so much less work for me. *sigh* decisions, decisions
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Posted by thought4food
Thought For Food 